Dustin's Best of 2017, #2: Katie Ellen - 'Cowgirl Blues'

In terms of most plays accumulated in the shortest period of time, I'm pretty sure Katie Ellen would take the number one spot on this list. In just two weeks, I racked up 300 plays from this album, and another 100 by mid-August. I already called Sløtface's Try Not to Freak Out the type of album that I needed in 2017, but Cowgirl Blues *is* the album that I needed this year. As an album that is, at least on the surface level, a break-up album that was released in mid-July and as someone who broke up with a girl I'd been dating for seven years in mid-July, it was unavoidable that it would become one of my favorite albums of the year- and maybe even of all time. It's still pretty early to definitively call that one, but it really does feel like an essential part of my being after this year. I had even flirted with the idea of getting a tattoo inspired by the lyrics to "Bleeding Heart" (the tattoo never happened).

I'm not much of a song-writer, but Cowgirl Blues almost comes off as autobiographical when I listen to it and I feel like it expresses a lot of what I've had trouble putting into words. There's a deep sense of pain and sorrow in the narrative of the album, but it also comes with a message of freedom. And that's what I took away from my endless summer listens of Cowgirl Blues: it's not always easy to take care of yourself when it comes at the expense of hurting someone else, but sometimes you need to put yourself first. I had reached a point where I didn't feel happy anymore, and I felt like staying was doing more harm than good for the both of us. And I think this album does a fantastic job at capturing that odd state of being where you feel terrible for breaking up with someone you've known and loved for years but you also feel slightly closer to contentment because you don't feel weighed down anymore. I'm not even sure if those are the right words to describe how I felt over the summer, but this is the album that helped me get through a lot of my grief.

Sadly, Cowgirl Blues has become a bit of a difficult listen for me these days. I can still make it through the album, but it also brings me back to sitting in my old apartment and feeling like it wasn't home anymore. I may be in a better place now because of these songs, but it still reminds me of when I was feeling less than, and it's a hard mental place to go back to right now. (But I swear, I feel like this will grow to be one of my favorite albums of all time, and when I start passing down music to my children, Katie Ellen will be one of the bands that make the cut).

Stream / buy Cowgirl Blues below.

Recommended tracks: "Wild Heart," "TV Dreams," "Sad Girls Club," "Houses Into Homes," "Cowgirl Blues," "Bleeding Heart"